I am really sorry. For having you endure all my nonsense for the past few days. Really. I shall try to control myself more. I think it's the stress accumulating in me and so i am more easily irritable. Sorry. Really really! SORRY!!! Please dont hate me or what okay?



I really dont know what happened to me. What in the world has happened to me? I also desperately want to know. But I just can't seem to find the reason. But the only probable reason now is STRESS. Am I stressed? I have never known myself to be stressed. Even in p6 during the PSLE season. The most I was nervous and anxious, worried whatever. But stress? I never remember when I ever felt that way. I really want to just run away. I dont know how to cope with everything. With concert coming, I am still not putting in enough hard work and effort, and yet I slack. And my history PT. Even worse. How could I doze off halfway?! I seriously irritated myself so so so much! And I am still irritated. Even though I managed to chiong all the way to 6.30 from around 6 to finish it, I am still damn pissed with myself. How can I be so slack? How can I not feel the sense of urgency? WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH ME?
Can't everything stop. Just let me take a breather? I really want more breathing space. BUT I am sure I can have it, provided I stop wasting time. I am really trying very hard already. But yet, nothing is happening?! I want to run away. Away from everything! Reality, life, whatever. I am trying to handle it as best as I can. And yet. I disappoint myself time and again. And when in the world am I going to finally realise my mistake?! When am I going to wake up from this terrible nightmare? When will I finally get things going as per normal? It is times like this when I can't help but feel sad. When I can't help but feel I am a loser. But it seriously is the truth. I can't get anything going right. I can't get anything done. I can't bring myself to do things. I can't motivate myself anymore. There is no longer any motivation. I really want to just stop everything. I really want. But in that case, I will be running away from reality. And that is so not good! And I dont want to. I really dont want to break down again. After 3 bouts of it already? I am getting myself on my own nerves. Seriously just stop it! Please. I want to have more time. To do things better. Please. I want to. I beg you. Wenyi, wake up. Seriously. Please. There will be no other chance anymore.


Currently feeling better already. After letting it out. Thanks claudia! <3
And I am really sorry yifei! Sorry for being so insensitive! Jiayouus okay?<3



I actually want to blog about monday. But I am no longer in the mood.

Sorry.

This became such a _______ post. You can insert the most appropriate word inside.




Stressed. Please stop it. Everything.